35. “100” – The Game, Drake (7)

“I would have so many friends if I didn’t have money, respect, and accomplishments”

The Game finding a soulful beat and the rapper of the moment to outshine himself on the way to chart success? Hmm. Seems familiar.

34. “…And Beyond” – Modern Baseball

“Just don’t walk away when I say ‘crush’”

It’s those butterflies, they never really go away. You can attribute them to a fear of rejection, the intimidation the object of your desire inspires, even original sin, if you’re superstitious enough. I don’t know the reason. Modern Baseball doesn’t either, but they’ve made a decent tune about it.

33. “Post to Be” – Omarion, Chris Brown, Jhene Aiko

“but he gotta eat the booty like groceries”

Take for example how Omarion, hitless for six years, comes back in a blaze of glory sounding as indistinct as possible. Or how Chris Brown refuses to switch up his tried-and-true formula of taking drugs + having sex with someone else’s woman. Or how that seminal booty-eating line is so ridiculous that Ms. Aiko refuses to mouth it in the video. This song is double stupid. But it’s still a flawless execution of 2015 top-40 magic, analingus notwithstanding.

32. “California” – Grimes (2)

“I didn’t think you’d end up treating me so bad” 

Take one part Simon and Garfunkel, drown it in ironic sunshine, cook it in an electric oven for forty years, and drizzle with Disney princess to make your iconic “I hate California” track.

31. “Leroy and Lanisha” – Kamasi Washington

Full disclosure: Jazz is as foreign to me as animal husbandry or Southeast Asian politics. But reading that Los Angeles saxophonist Kamasi Washington dedicated a song on his latest album to Vince Guaraldi’s timeless “Linus and Lucy” compelled me enough to toss on a beret and take a spin.





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